Term 2 - Week 1 + 1/2

Okay, the whole Week 1,2,3,4,5 whatever isn't going so well. :/

I just thought I would update because I've got a bit of free time, I should of course
be using that free time to get some work done, but I won't be able to blog this sunday
because I'll be having a pretty busy sunday and I have to call my parents somewhere
in between everything I've got going on.

Basically went to see the people in settle and it went well I think. I need to backtrack a little bit I think. My Christian friend Emily, has been trying to get me to go and see the school chaplain about my homosexuality 'issue'. Emily's very nice, she's just not sure what to think as a Christian. I was sort of feeling pushed towards having a conversation with her about it all, but it didn't turn out as I planned. I wound up telling her that I'd like a Christian perspective on homosexuality. In some sense I do, because I think I need to go through what the bible is with an open mind and figure out what I think/believe about it all at some stage. I don't have time while I'm at school right now though. I also feel that God is speaking to me in many ways in my life and what he is saying is 'you're ok'. (The concept of God speaking to me must be an interesting one for an atheist/agnostic. But there it is.) Anyway, I quickly realised that I said I'd go and speak to the Chaplain because there was something in me that thought he might have the 'cure' because I've never wanted to be gay. (Most people that know me know that, I think. That is why I incessantly insist that being gay is NOT a choice, because if it was I wouldn't be gay.) But something deep within me knew that whatever 'cure' he would give me wouldn't be a real cure, and I came to the revelation that was why I had wanted to talk to him in the first place. Not to get the 'Christian perspective' but in the hope he might have some magic cure. Anyway, I discussed Emily pushing me to go and talk to him with the people in settle, and a couple of days after talking to them came to this conclusion. And right before I came to this conclusion, because I realised I didn't actually want to go and talk to him, I told her as much. I might go in to more detail about my revelation with her, I might not. She's pretty open-minded, she's just not sure what to think in many ways. And that's ok. I think so many gay people forget what it's like to be in a place of 'not knowing what to think' that when they come in contact with someone who is homophobic in the literal sense of the word (scared of gays) they think that they're being attacked when they're not, that person just isn't in a place of being able to understand yet. I don't think she's homophobic in the literal sense of the word, she's not scared of talking about it with me, and like I said, she's quite open-minded. She's just unsure of how to approach it from a Christian point of view. Obviously, when you do meet someone who is literally homophobic, its quite easy to feel like you're being attacked, because in reality that person standing in front of you, is the person you used to be, whether you'd like to think that or not. I find myself being much more patient and able to understand such people because I realise they are exactly who I used to be but also that there are parts of them which still make up who I am. They're not so far disconnected with the person I am today, that I'm unable to see that in reality 'past me' is standing in front of me. If that makes sense...

We are studying Serialism in music. I don't like the music persay, but I'm quite enjoying the studying of it. It's really interesting. I won't explain it all on here (mainly because I don't understand it all, plus the rest of you would probably find it really boring). I'm definitely thinking music at University. MY TUTOR IS MR. EVERHART! One of my music teachers. I'm happy. :)
I start piano lessons next week. Should be fun. They are with my other music teacher, Mr. Arkel.

I'm going to be performing the song Wrapped in Your Arms by Fireflight in the school's next rock concert, I think. I might change, if my mum gets my guitar strings to me in time then I might do Closer to Fine by Indigo Girls, just me and my guitar. That would be sweet.

Been invited to join Schola Cantorum, the school's special choir which you join by invitation. We have a concert this weekend. AAAAAH!!! Hopefully, all will go well.

MY DRAMA PIECE!!! In Drama, we are doing the play The Trial by Steven Berkoff, which is a play adaption of the novel The Trial by Franz Kafka. Kafka wrote Metamorphosis just for some context. I got the role of 'Inspector'. I'm going to have fun with this, methinks. I have to do this massively ridiculous walk. I wasn't sure at first, to be honest, but I think it's going to be good. :)

Right well, that's all I can think of for now. :)

signing off,

Geraldine. M

Song for the Week + 1/2:

Prelude no. 15 - 'Raindrop' by Frederic Chopin.

Two things - yes, it's a classic piece (romantic technically). + I FIGURED OUT HOW TO PUT LINKS ON HERE! (just click on it and it well send you there OR right click + add new tab!)